On Becoming an Elementary School Janitress

That's right. I am an elementary school janitress. It is my job every Tuesday to vacuum the classrooms of Oak Mountain Elementary School. Earlier this year, I somehow temporarily lost complete and utter sanity long enough for the boyfriend to persuade me to take this horrific job with him. How hard could it be to vacuum classrooms on one hall, one day a week? Oh how naive, how completely innocent were those days!

Tuesdays are dreaded days now. The tedious, deathly boring monotony of pushing a vacuum back and forth, side to side, back and forth.... It never ends. Just as I am beginning to tire, the hallway stretches forth as if it were elastic, the rooms seem to multiply, and every child's happy face drawing sticky-tacked to the wall mocks me in silent amusement.

It is, by and large, the worst job I have ever had.

Fortunately, there are two lessons to be learned from this unique experience:
One: Never trust boys. They will, in some way or another, get you to vacuum!
Two: Stay in school so you can get a decent job, kids!